GUEST BLOG: How My Family Grew Together While Living Apart

Up until the start of 2015, I never could have imagined that the three members of my little family would each be living in a different city for nearly two years. 

My daughter had just turned 16, my husband had a good job, and I had a nice daily routine. Then she was introduced (not by me) to the idea of going to a residential high school in another state. I was not a fan of this idea. Yes, the school had an excellent reputation for meeting the needs of high achievers and had several articulation agreements with colleges allowing for dual enrollment. However, it was in another state.

She was thrilled, but I could not grasp the idea of her living seven hours away and only seeing her for a few days every six weeks. Luckily for me, there were issues of residency and power of attorney that would need to be addressed since we did not live in the same state as the school. I hoped it would all fall through.  

However, God had other plans and was at work in some of His mysterious yet straightforward ways. Around that time, my husband lost his job. Suddenly all the opportunities presented to him were in the same state as the high school my daughter wanted to attend.

Granted, these opportunities were four hours south of the school, but still, it solved the residency issue.

At this point, you may be thinking, “So, you all move to the new city, and she goes to the new high school — that doesn’t seem that strange.” 

Except, I was not going to move. Not because of any grand statement or refusal — I was simply staying with the house. The older, paid-for house, getting it ready to rent or possibly sell. Also, my husband and daughter both wanted to still be able to call home, well, “home.” So, I stayed, and they went to their respective locations.  

Shifting the Lens on What Family Life Looks Like

It seemed strange at first. Our friends and family could not understand our decisions, despite our explanations and the amount of prayer we had put into making those decisions. Still, we were all confident we were doing what the Lord had told us to do. 

The multi-city living arrangement lasted for two years. My husband would come home on weekends, or I would go to see him. Our daughter had extended weekends or holiday breaks roughly every six weeks, so we were all together during those breaks. 

​Yes, it took some getting used to, especially in the beginning. But that crazy season was one of the most beneficial of our lives; it required us all to depend on the Lord in ways we had not before and to see His amazing provision all over our lives. 

Just two months before our daughter’s high school graduation, my husband got a job offer that would bring him back home, and since she would no longer need residency, this would bring the time of multi-city living to an end. The Lord made a way for us to all be in the same city again. 

We Embraced Our Soft Never

That Soft Never was worth every moment apart and every mile driven over those two years. My daughter graduated high school with enough dual-enrolled credits to enter college as a Junior. My husband and I had grown deeper in our relationship with each other and with the Lord. God had taught us how good and faithful He is when we obey. Now, when our daughter tells us where she is traveling, or a job situation sends my husband to another city, it is easy to smile and say, “Ok God, you’ve got this — let’s go.”